I hope you enjoy the full interview, and that I might meet some of you at the Texas Fruit Festival! This is a very affordable 4-day festival April 30 - May 3, in Austin, Texas. I will post the festival website link below the interview. Use my code “ellen” for savings on your ticket!

https://texasfruitfestival.com/

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I so appreciate you! Thank you for allowing me into your inbox every Sunday morning. I really enjoy sharing my thoughts and insights through writing, and I love knowing that some of you find inspiration or companionship in my words.
After 3 full years of dedication to these steady weekly blog-posts, it’s time for me to open up space for a shift.

It has taken far longer than I expected to step into clarity about the scope of my offerings here. This will remain my online home-base, and I will continue to share my experience of life with you here. I need some time to listen for what organically wants to emerge next. I will keep posting while I feel into the future, just probably not every week for a bit (I might have to write an essay on the new Food Pyramid…hmmm).

I sincerely welcome all your feedback! Let me know what you have valued most about my writings, what moves or inspires you, what you look forward to each week here, and/or what would make you more likely to open and engage with my emails!

Thank you extra much to my paying subscribers — your financial contribution means so much to me, and I will be grateful for your continued support as I feel into the next version of my presence here. If you wish to shift your precious resources elsewhere as I make this unspecified shift, I completely understand.

I don’t want to say too much right now about what the evolution of this blog-spot may look like, because I don’t know yet! Some seismic shifts have been happening under (and on top of) the surface of my own personal life, so much so that I have chosen RECALIBRATION to be my personal theme word for 2026. Can anyone relate?!

Seismic shifts, recalibration, quantum leaps….these are big concepts! And they deserve the deepest inner attention and presence. To those of you who have faithfully followed me over the years and decades, I appreciate your steady trust. And to those who may have just discovered my writings and teachings more recently, I hope you will stick around for more good things to come — all in divine ripe timing. I am just taking a creative time-out, a brief hibernation-time to recalibrate on many levels. It’s a necessary part of conscious living, now and then, and I always wish to be bringing the best, most conscious version of me to share with you here :).

The invisible quantum leap is the one you FEEL steadily rising up in you, slowly but oh-so-surely, long before it becomes outwardly coherent. Sometimes the feeling of it rising in you is deeply inspiring or exciting, sometimes a bit scary or confusing. Some days you’re all-in, following the call with a wholehearted YES, other days you’re hanging back a bit, unsure and still scoping out the new scene from a safe distance. At least this is how significant growth often shows up in my life!

Happy New Year, everyone. Let’s all pay close attention to those deepest whispers from the heart, and trust the messages that are asking for our conscious evolution this year. I look forward to hearing from you — about anything and everything that is on your heart. I call this site “Living Heart” for a reason ;).

AMAZING SPRING/SUMMER OPPORTUNITIES 2026!!
I really want to promote these OUTSTANDING healthy-living, community-building vegan festival/retreat events. All three of these events are collaborative works of LOVE, and have been well-honed over years of wholehearted dedication from many incredibly generous souls who want to make the world a better, healthier, happier place. I hope to see you at one or more of them! Get all the juicy details at the links below:

TEXAS, APRIL 30-MAY 4: This year will be my first appearance at The Texas Fruit Festival: https://texasfruitfestival.com/

MICHIGAN, JUNE 14-18: I’ll be back for my third appearance at the Vegan Wellness Retreat: https://www.veganwellnessretreats.com/
USE MY CODE: ELLEN$100 TO SAVE $100 OFF YOUR TICKET PRICE!

LOTS OF NEW FEATURES ADDED to this festival this year! Like how about Banana nice-cream served up all day everyday - WOW!

CALIFORNIA, AUGUST 9-16: I’ll miss this one this year, but exciting things are afoot for the return of the infamous WOODSTOCK FRUIT FESTIVAL (first time in California!): https://thewoodstockfruitfestival.org/

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I will tell you what I am doing, with a commitment to meeting the new year as truthfully as I can. I am taking an honest inventory of any and all places where I am not feeling the ease of full alignment and personal empowerment. I am unwinding betrayal - looking directly at where I may be tempted to feel betrayed by certain of life’s challenges, or by other people, and recognizing with radical honesty - and finally deep gratitude! - how these experiences point me to where I have been willing to betray myself. Self-betrayal is often subtle, and hidden from our view, because it appears obvious and justified to blame our circumstances or other people’s behavior for our pain.

New Year’s Resolutions are like starry-eyed delusions, if we are not prepared to meet them with 100% personal responsibility for re-training ourselves from the inside out. We can muster the will-power to allow only the best parts of ourselves to the table - for our new diet, new exercise plan, or other shiny new intentions - but only for so long (a few weeks?). Soon, the inconvenient parts of us that we have shoved aside, consciously or often unconsciously, are having tantrums and screaming for our attention….and our well-intentioned resolutions are crowded out by our familiar, comfortably uncomfortable default patterns. Now we experience a double self-betrayal! First we denied (rather than transformed) parts of ourselves that didn’t consent to our brave new intentions, and then we failed to keep our New Year’s Resolutions. Double-whammy. Every time we break an agreement we made with ourself, we lose a degree of self-respect.

I have cracked the code on that kind of defeating self-sabotage! I don’t always get it right immediately, but I do know what I need to do and I choose to pick myself up and do it, whether I feel like it or not. I hope that I can inspire you to do the same, if you ever suffer from the self-betrayal double-whammy effect. The key to true self-confidence and real strength (see my previous post: “Existential Confidence”), is to stop rejecting the uncomfortable, ‘unacceptable,’ or immature parts of yourself. The most painful emotions that most of us deem unacceptable usually accompany these rejected parts of ourselves - which is exactly why we reject them in the first place! Who delights in digging up intense feelings of long-buried rage or hatred toward our loved ones, or ourselves? Who chomps at the bit to uncover the burden of old unmet grief? It’s not fun….but I promise you, the rewards are priceless and will positively change and empower you forever.

With your whole self held in your conscious awareness, you can approach the things you want in life with a steady honesty that defies your old way of operating from outworn beliefs and with only your allowable, approvable parts visible to you. Layer by layer, as long-buried emotional intensity and discarded parts are met with real, radical honesty and compassion, the unseen inner conflict begins to dissolve, and with it the chronic self-division and tension that inevitably led to self-sabotage, discouragement, and energetic exhaustion in the past.

The more I learn, the more I am awed by the incredibly powerful role of the mind in ALL of our physical and emotional discomforts in life. Fortunately for us, our brains are designed with apparently limitless bio-plasticity - that is, we have the innate capacity to alter our brains in ways that literally blow the mind, and can change the whole course of our life. Sometimes, with the right knowledge, this transformation happens in the flash of insight, but most often it requires intention, presence, and consistent practice.

I have long been fascinated by the study of what are known as mind-body pain syndromes and illness. This winter I’ve been reading more about the ever-expanding, fascinating field of neuroscience. It is at once daunting in its complexity, and thrilling in its expansion of possibility. I have read hundreds of testimonials from people who were even bed-bound or wheelchair-bound for years with pain or illness that medical approaches could not cure, and once they sincerely believed and persistently applied the right information and BELIEF, they brought about an actual change in their brains simultaneous with the disappearance of all of their debilitating symptoms, no matter how dire, hopeless or permanent they had appeared. There is even a body of research that compares brain MRI’s before and after recovery from chronic pain or illness. There are dramatic changes visible on the films.

My readers know I believe in the power of natural diet and lifestyle habits to bring about dramatic positive changes. In most cases, when practiced with right knowledge and consistent commitment, this will eventually cure lingering pain and dis-ease symptoms, including most mental illness. It is uncommon, however, that people commit with consistency to the level of natural diet and lifestyle that can fully uncover the blueprint for vibrant health of our biological design. Also, the importance of an empowered mindset, emotional poise and nervous system regulation needed (in addition to right food and other lifestyle habits) is usually underestimated.

Our language matters SO much! It starts with what we say to ourselves, and about ourselves and our life, internally. And then with every sentence we give voice to, we speak our future into existence. When we attach emotion to our words, we are telling our nervous system how to feel. Are we giving our nervous system a message of danger, or safety? Of defeat, or possibility? Of being stuck, or pulled forward by a compelling vision? Of victimhood, or empowerment? Of urgency, or ease? Your mindset has to be TRAINED to stay elevated and helpful to your well-being. This does not mean ignoring your pain or faking positivity - but it does mean purposefully choosing to feel empowered and responsible for the quality of your thoughts, your beliefs, and you vibration, no matter what the external circumstances might be at the time.

At the end of this post, I have shared a couple of amazing books I’ve been reading this winter. This knowledge will expand you! For many people, the information is enough to empower them to act in new ways and bring about the breakthrough they’ve been waiting for. If you know you benefit from a human-to-human coaching relationship, I want you to know that I am available (my coaching is all by donation now) to help you:

-identify your outworn beliefs
-reconcile with your rejected parts
-clearly articulate your new vision
-speak like someone who understands that you are programming your reality
-create, practice, and rewire a brand new pattern, and a more powerful you!

Don’t wait for your circumstances to change - that’s not the way real transformation works. Remember, “wherever you go, there YOU are!” You can choose to bring a more confident version of you into 2026, and watch what feels hard at first quickly begin to feel natural with practice.

RESOURCES

The Way Out: A Revolutionary, Scientifically Proven Approach to Healing Chronic Pain, by Alan Gordon

Mind Your Body: A Revolutionary Program to Release Chronic Pain and Anxiety, by Nicole J. Sachs

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I have continued to journal daily…focused more now on uncovering suppressed emotions that might still be sneakily obstructing my fully authentic expression of sovereignty and inner peace. It’s not an easy process, this inner digging, but it is rewarding to feel awareness expanding, tensions easing, and to sense my growing capacity to hold life loosely.

Since moving back to Michigan I have enjoyed more time with my adult children, and deepening my bond with my young grandson, as well as having more connection to the arrival of a second grandchild in November. I am anticipating the birth of a third grandchild in February of the new year. So many new blessings - and so much more to make space for, too. It’s a significant transition for me, and rich with potent invitations for my evolution. It feels ever more important - and possible - to continue to elevate my consciousness into the highest vibrational frequencies (love, compassion, peace, joy). When I succeed in holding the challenges of life loosely, I am my most peaceful and free, and I give calmly and genuinely from overflow.

I wish us all a beautifully expansive new year ahead; a year that is responsive to our willingness to hold things loosely, and to let ourselves glow with the naturally vibrant energies this liberates in us.

Here is the reprint of my post from one year ago:

On the night of the Solstice, I made a campfire in my backyard and began the process of burning my old journals. It’s something I’ve been thinking of doing for a few years now, and the decision to move to another home in 2025 brought it to the surface once again. I have a huge and very heavy bin of journals filled with my writing that spans about 40 years of my life. Some people are shocked that I would burn them up! To me, though, it feels like a weight lifted. Quite literally, it is the heaviest of my packed up bins to move! But more symbolically, the contents of all that writing is simply a record of my mental and emotional process at the time. When I open one and read that process now, it pulls my energy into the past and captivates it there in a way that I don’t find helpful to my current life.

My journaling is so much more about process than about descriptive record-keeping, it just does not need a shelf-life. In fact, my journals are often disorganized because I will grab whatever notebook I can find when I am wanting to process my thoughts through writing, and some of the journals jump around between dates (even years) or leave off the dates altogether! It would be time-consuming work to connect the puzzle pieces in meaningful chronological order, and I simply have no interest. Also, this type of journal-writing is meant only for me, not for others to discover and read after I am gone. Keeping them around, I feel burdened by the thought that I “should” go back and re-read them, as if that would enlighten me somehow, or as one friend suggested, use them to write a book! No.

Letting go of my mental/emotional past in this way is one of my turning points as I move into the new year. It is one powerful piece of my simplification intentions, one more way to free up energy for present-moment living, one more way to release whatever blocks my true authenticity. I had a mentor who would say, “Step into the flow of the ever-upward spiraling energy of the universe!”

The way to be grounded in the stillness of present-moment awareness, yet never feel stagnant, dissatisfied or limited in your life, is to palpably know at all times your connection to the cosmic, universal energetic source-field that you are a living expression of. Your Authentic Self is the one who is always vitally aware of her connection to this limitless energetic source. It becomes a very valuable question, to ask: What is it that is your greatest longing? And what is in the way of you satisfying that longing, at last?

For most of us, what gets in our way is excessive mental chatter, preoccupation and rumination that keeps us focused in past or future, unable to rest without fear in the exquisite satisfaction and well-being of the present moment. I look for ways to reduce my engagement with that incessant mental chatter, and to increase my felt experience of my authentic self, my direct experience of the freely flowing life-current.

What I have discovered is that simplification of my outer commitments, including possessions as well as relationships, is a helpful starting place on this sacred path to embodying my authentic Self. Meditation, walking barefoot on the earth in silence, feeling the sunshine, breezes, and rain on my skin, listening to soothing music, lighting candles, and spending time in silent solitude are all helpful. Ultimately, it’s about cultivating an experience of wonder, awe, deep presence, and reverence for the whole kaleidoscope of life, even in its most ordinary or unwanted presentations.

My personal priorities have shifted, and I will be heading into the new year more resolved than ever to allow my life to be an expression of my direct experience of the infinite source energy, freely flowing through my mind, heart, and body. It really does begin to feel to me as though nothing else truly matters. Imagine how this experience positively affects literally EVERYTHING encountered, desired, created or expressed on the life journey.

I wonder, at times, how leaving my warm, sunny nature-paradise in Florida, and moving back to Michigan’s colder climate will impact the ease with which I connect with the natural higher consciousness of life. The most direct path for me is found in the experience of immersing my body and my senses in nature. This will often be less comfortable in the chilly, less sunny north! My mother sent me a book for Christmas to help me with this: “How to Winter.” It’s an interesting book, but it misses the point that the reason many of us find the northern winter challenging is because it is not our natural human habitat! We can only physically survive there because of our clever use of lots of technology. Some of us very sensitive souls feel this displacement acutely.

Most importantly, wherever we find ourselves geographically or situationally, if we are to find our way to the deep inner peace that accompanies our connection to what breathes us, we must reduce the mental and life-clutter we have accumulated, and balance our emotional response to life. As the book, How to Winter suggests, my strategies for maintaining this direct connection and equilibrium will shift somewhat in Michigan (for example, I will need more warm clothing to help me enjoy nature in the winter weather, I will probably light more candles and make more tea, and I will return to the sacred act of building fires in a wood-stove often, and meditating in a sauna).

As I slowly work through the burning of all the stacks of my old journals, I enjoy this conscious, intentional act of letting go. Written scribbles expressing the haphazard mental and emotional processing of a distant former self are no longer important to me. I continue to process my observations of life through stream-of-consciousness journaling, but for now on I will let each of my journals go as soon as it is filled. What matters is the wide open space of the present moment, and the pure simplicity of feeling my belonging in the flowing current of Source-energy, as I experience each moment of connection for the first time.

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If our wholeness is innate and guaranteed, then we don’t need the approval of others to prove we are enough. And if we don’t need their approval, then we also don’t need to be fully or properly understood, to prove our worthiness (to ourself or to anyone else). What if you already are free, safe, and secure right now? How would you inhabit and embrace life differently, if you knew this to be true? What wise discernment, or discriminating awareness, could you access if you could see without distortion?

My own experience has been that it is only in solitude that I am able to truly listen, and begin to perceive what I actually have, what I already am. Sometimes, solitude initially feels uncomfortable or even dangerous, but with time and willingness it has shown me that I am full in my own presence. Through this practice I have grown my capacity to be present with what is, and to not only tolerate but befriend my own pain, confusion, and difficult emotions. I become an inexhaustible presence for myself! We want this from others, but the secret is that we can give it to ourselves.

Meeting myself in solitude has gifted me direct encounters of my own intuition - direct experience of my own consciousness. It helps me to distill truth from all the chaos and confusion “out there.” It helps me find inner/higher guidance, and make peace with whatever decisions I choose. In solitude I find my sovereignty, which was there all along awaiting my discovery. In solitude I finally realize that it is impossible to be truly alone, because we are innately and infinitely a part of the bigger whole of consciousness, and of existence. We are inextricably connected to something beyond our limited perception of our little self - we are already permanently admitted into the only truly important club!

A conscious practice of solitude does not necessarily make my life always easy or simple, but it does offer a profound deepening of my recognition of who and what I am, and where my true power is to be found. And the growing of this capacity opens the way for an embodied experience of ‘existential confidence.’ When I understand through direct experience that my joy is not dependent on getting what I think I want, I release my grip and relax more into simple presence and acceptance. When I am not trying to get something from other people or situations, I am naturally much more available to give freely. When I know the fullness of my own company which is always available to me, I grow my capacity to be more present with other people.

Whether you live and work with others or alone currently, giving conscious solitude a significant place in your life will bring incredible, unimagined blessings to you. What I mean by ‘conscious’ solitude, is that you bring to your time with yourself a willingness to be present with whatever arises. Become aware of your habitual flinching, and distractions such as social media scrolling, emotional eating, calling or texting friends instead of being with yourself, over-exercising, or any other tactics you may use to sidestep the direct experience of the initial ‘void’ or resistance that conscious solitude reveals.

With patience and willingness, you may come to deeply treasure your time in solitude, as it becomes a safe space of truly honorable and compassionate friendship with yourself. You realize that your inner well-being does not depend on other people, or on external events or circumstances. YOU are HERE for yourself - always! You begin to genuinely want to use your own thoughts in service to your highest good. You become more discerning about the stewardship of your energy, and more willingly responsible for the quality of your own daily frequency.

The winter holiday season will test most of us with extra social invitations, which may often be felt as ‘obligations.’ And if we find ourself in a chapter of life without much access to or desire for family or community, this season may test our ability to make peace with the default of solitude, at a time when the dominant collective messaging is about joining with others, extra-generously.

I believe that the best, most generous and loving present you can give to yourself and others this holiday season (and always!) is your inexhaustible presence with your own self, and all that arises when you stop distracting and distancing from the truth of your beautiful, wondrous, fully whole and complete natural essence. Make a heartfelt intention to increase your conscious attention to yourself in solitude, and prepare to be amazed at the expansive radiance you will tap into, and then begin to share with others! See what happens when you enter a holiday gathering standing tall, calm, radiant and open-hearted, in your newfound knowing of your existential confidence :).

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We want the result, but we are not getting into action. We understand what is needed, but we are not changing. The primal, survival part of our brain that is forever seeking safety convinces us: “Don’t do it, it’s dangerous!” Usually what feels dangerous is that it’s uncertain. The primal part of the brain is addicted to feelings of safety, and it hates uncertainty and unpredictability.

Here are 3 really powerful questions to ask yourself when you are avoiding doing something important that feels difficult:

“What am I resisting?”

“Why do I resist what is good for me?”

“What am I afraid of losing by stepping into the difficult?”

We know from experience that doing hard things requires attention, uncertainty, and stress tolerance — and all of these require energy. Finding myself faced with resistance to committing myself wholeheartedly to something big, important, and difficult, I asked myself these questions. My responses were along these lines:

Please, I don’t want to get hurt anymore! (primal brain)
What if I give it my all and still fail?
I don’t want to find out that this doesn’t work, either.
It might take too long to get results, and I might run out of patience or energy.
I might lose my hope for a real solution, if this one doesn’t work after all my effort.

It’s helpful to face these questions, and honestly acknowledge our fear-based answers — with compassion and understanding. We ALL have subconscious programing running beneath our awareness, and these questions can at least begin to tap into the self-sabotaging kinds of beliefs that have become ingrained over time. You CAN change your relationship with your mind, but you cannot simply force it to do the most difficult things - you need to understand WHY it resists you.

Armed with this understanding, it is possible to make a conscious DECISION to “take the reins.” Memories of past failures, pain, humiliation, or discomfort with responsibility will surface still, but when you are determined to understand the process, and take the reins, you can discover something truly amazing: the incredible neuroplasticity of the mind, defined as ‘the ability of the brain to form new connections and reorganize itself as a reaction to new experiences or information.’

Each time you overcome resistance, you create a new neural pathway. Over time, with persistence, new pathways accumulate and monumental, life-transforming leaps and changes become possible. It DOES take energy and persistence to reprogram, restructure, and rewire neural pathways. Start with the smaller things, and begin to think of each step as a ritual, an integral part of the inner awakening that is bringing you home to your Self, and your wholeness.

When you approach challenges from this perspective, you may even begin to crave the difficult, believe it or not! It makes sense to me that the higher we reach, the bigger challenges we may face. The magic happens when we learn to embrace these challenges with gratitude, and determination to overcome — because we trust that the challenges are just what we need to pull us along on our journey to what we TRULY want: to know for real the peace and coherence of our sovereign wholeness.

We won’t realize our full consciousness and empowerment without facing and overcoming difficulties. We know this - and still we resist. It’s true that ‘old habits die hard,’ so we have to find a way to take the reins with determination, but also with deep understanding and compassion and try a NEW way, not as a bloody battle but as a sacred rite of growth, self-love, and self-realization. Rather than attempting to eliminate resistance, how about collaborating with it? Dialogue with the parts of you that are resistant. Find out what these parts are afraid of. Meet them. Acknowledge their pain. Ask for collaboration with them.

Find deeper meaning for the actions you wish to take, and turn your actions into rituals and rites of passage. Speak powerful, positive language to yourself, and about yourself and your life. If it helps you to have external accountability support, find an accountability partner or hire a coach. You are not alone in whatever your biggest challenge might be.

I found inspiration recently in the book: Power Vs Force, by David R. Hawkins. He discusses the levels of human consciousness, from lowest to highest presented in this order: shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear, desire, anger, pride, courage, neutrality, willingness, acceptance, reason, love, joy, peace, enlightenment. True personal power begins to emerge with the higher levels - starting with courage. There is an extensive chart in the book about “Power Patterns in Human Attitudes.” It is a beautiful list of powerful ‘attractor patterns,’ each one contrasted with its corresponding weak pattern.

Examples (power on the left, weakness on the right):

Accepting / Rejecting
Allowing / Controlling
Aware / Preoccupied
Believing / Insisting
Challenged / Impeded
Courageous / Reckless
Determined / Stubborn
Inviting / Urging
Leading / Coercing
Orderly / Confused
Powerful / Forceful
Steadfast / Faltering

The list takes up 4 long columns! I like to study it, and pick out the ones most applicable to whatever challenge I find myself facing. I find it offers truly helpful ‘reframes’ to aid in the process of rewiring thinking and attitudinal patterns, restructuring neural pathways, and finally taking the reins of personal power. Unlike force, which brings only temporary results, true power inspires and motivates endlessly. When we embrace our power, doing the difficult things becomes the perfect challenge to help us become what we truly want to become.

READY TO DREAM AN INSPIRED SUMMER DREAM?

I’m thrilled to be part of the Vegan Wellness Retreat 2026 team! 🌿✨
I’ll be joining an amazing lineup of speakers, chefs, and wellness leaders for five days of learning, connection, movement, plant-based meals, and lakeside fun in beautiful Northern Michigan.

If you’re interested in joining us, use my code Ellen$100 for $100 off your ticket.
Would love to see some of you there next June! 💛
veganwellnessretreat.com

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When I relocated to southern Florida in 2020, I never imagined that I would be living through another long Michigan winter! But here I am, in 2025, and doing my best to flow with it because I know that resistance is not only futile, but harmful to my health. I do expect to travel south for a couple of months in future winters, but this winter I have compelling reasons to stay put in Michigan for the duration.

What I’d like to explore is the healthy relationship, in winter, between retreating inward in tune with nature’s dormant season, and maintaining vibrant physical health at the same time. Some people experience more illness in winter, despite maintaining good health habits, and I myself have extra physical injury challenges this winter. So there may be physical reasons to slow down in this season, which can be conducive to some deeper mental and emotional rest, reflection, and recalibration. However, it’s really important to keep the body moving, in whatever ways we are able. Moving the body brings critical circulation to the lymph system, helping us to continually detoxify, which may be especially important when we are spending so much time in relatively stagnant, dry indoor air in the northern winter. Daily movement also helps with mental and emotional balance, of course.

I have some basic exercise equipment in my home, my favorite being my mini trampoline. I highly recommend every household have one of these, and keep it easily accessible in your main living spaces, especially during the winter! There are many available, but be sure to invest in a quality one to protect your joints. Here is an example: https://rebound-air.com/product/reboundairtm-standard/

There is also lots I can do with just my own body weight to get my blood flowing and muscles pumping, such as versions of slow squats and pushups. I am also fortunate to have access to a local gym a few blocks from my home. I have been thinking about finding a nearby swimming pool as well - I don’t like the idea of chlorine exposure, but freedom of movement in water is very helpful when working with injuries that make other movements challenging. Some pools also offer a hot tub, sauna or steam-room, which are deeply relaxing and rejuvenating.

Another idea is to visit indoor botanical gardens, like the one in my area that has a huge tropical humid greenhouse environment that stays warm and plant-rich all winter long. I am currently getting a whole-house humidifier installed on my old furnace, and in the meantime I have a couple of portable humidifiers operating at all times in my house. We are designed to live in a humid, tropical environment, so I do what I can to mimic that in my home, with plants and humidifiers. Because I often have a cozy fire going in my woodstove, I have to do a little extra to add humidity back to the indoor air. Another very important aspect of mimicking our natural environment is to use a Sperti Vitamin D lamp daily. I use mine for 10 minutes a day. It’s better than taking a Vitamin D supplement, because the lamp is a much more effective replacement for the whole array of sunshine’s many health benefits. https://www.sperti.com/product/sperti-vitamin-d-light-box/

Winter is a wonderful time to study and learn, and if you apply some of that time to studying about natural health, it will inspire you to keep up health-promoting habits even when that feels challenging! A quick search for books or videos about the field of ‘Natural Hygiene’ will offer a starting place. I am also forever studying about mind mastery and spiritual development, and journaling my feelings and insights daily. And this winter, I am learning new songs on my piano keyboard, for fun! I also plan to start dreaming up some new garden plans to be ready for springtime.

Working from home as I do, it is especially helpful in the winter for me to have a daily/weekly framework to bring some amount of discipline with the spaciousness of time. A top priority right for me right now is healing, so I consciously give at least 2 hours a day of focus on that, including journaling, exercises, and conscious restoration of my whole system. To be honest, I generally do that anyway, just that it’s more specifically focused right now, and even more vigilantly protected. I am a “river person,” who prefers to flow with my intuition rather than keep to a definite or rigid structure….but I do really well with what I call a “framework for freedom.” This is a rough outline for the day and week which keeps me on track with my purpose and goals, but holds a great deal of open space for me to choose my direction in the moment. Without this I might just curl up and hibernate by the woodstove all winter! Many mammals do….

Let’s talk about wintertime food strategies. When the weather is really cold, gray and snowy/icy, it feels unnatural to eat only cold raw foods - and it is!! We are designed to live in a warm climate. But if you, like me, find yourself in the north in wintertime, there are many strategies you can use to maintain a healthy, natural raw vegan diet more comfortably. Get foods out of the refrigerator well ahead of eating them, to let them come closer to room temperature. Gently warm foods if you wish, either immersing them in warm water, or warming them in the Vitamix, a dehydrator, or even in a saucepan on a low temperature, just stir constantly and be sure you can comfortably immerse your pinky finger (you’re just warming the food, not cooking it). I indulge in natural herbal teas in winter, or warm lemon-water. Make sure you are comfortably warm before you eat. You can achieve this by keeping your furnace higher, having a wood stove burning, taking a warm bath, shower or sauna if you get chilled, or simply engaging in a bit of quick vigorous exercise to get your blood flowing. A few super-slow squats will have you warm in seconds!

I called this post Fierce Winter Softness, because winter can be fierce - in its often brutal cold iciness, and also in what it demands of us physically, mentally, and emotionally. Yet winter also invites us into a special kind of hibernation-like softness, and when we find ways to embrace this winter can become a time of deep personal growth and honing our inner resilience.

READY TO DREAM ABOUT SUMMER?

I’m thrilled to be part of the Vegan Wellness Retreat 2026 team! 🌿✨
I’ll be joining an amazing lineup of speakers, chefs, and wellness leaders for five days of learning, connection, movement, plant-based meals, and lakeside fun in beautiful Northern Michigan.

If you’re interested in joining us, use my code Ellen$100 for $100 off your ticket.
Would love to see some of you there next June! 💛
veganwellnessretreat.com

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I do experience the lifelong journey back home to my Self as a spiral, in the sense that my deeper awareness is revealed layer, by layer, by layer, each lived revelation bringing me gradually closer to the central anchored essence of me. And in that deep center, I imagine lives the harmonic balance of heart and wisdom, in perfection. I like the image of the spiral also because although we humans repeat patterns and sometimes feel stuck in them, we are never in an endless “loop,” because we are always evolving and becoming, and therefore repeating a pattern from at least a slightly new vantage point each time. I believe we are always traveling a spiral path home to the truth of our center, however slow or non-directional the path may sometimes appear.

I am aware of a ‘false peace’ that masquerades as a return to the Self, but is not true freedom. We are not free until we have developed the capacity to hold both storm and silence, empathy and compassion, without fear of collapse. A healed heart is fierce and alive, not fragile. It is a keeper of sacred fire, and an alchemist of emotion. Intuitively, suffering is turned into wisdom, and anger into light. The healed empath at last becomes a sovereign being, possessing the freedom to face all experience directly, without being ruled by rigid structure, protection, fear, or overwhelm.

I have learned, through trial by fire, that the emotion most suppressed by empaths is rage. This subconscious rage ultimately breaks through a false peace, and becomes the doorway to divinity - if one is willing to open that door. The caring empath feels everyone else’s feelings easily, but often cannot embrace the deepest, most unacceptable depths of their own. For me, this suppressed rage expressed first as anxiety and depression in my early 20’s, then as chronic pains in my physical body. For others, it manifests as chronic disease, or ineffectiveness in life. It is the ache of misalignment and self-abandonment, the dissonance of disconnection with the innermost Self, the exhaustion of the pretending and performance required to ‘fit in’ or succeed by conventional measures.

People fear freedom, because it requires sovereignty, which is earned through periods of conscious solitude, and the courage to engage authentically with the complexity of life and relationships. Freedom requires choosing honesty over comfort, and being responsible for a deeply internal choreography of the dance between the heart and the mind. You must learn to feel safe in your own presence, and to truly inhabit time. Life becomes a response to what is real, no longer a reaction to appearances and ego needs.

It sounds powerful, doesn’t it? To live soulfully and with bold presence, a vessel through which light flows unobstructed, unbound by arbitrary structures or fear. Yet this is where true intuition leads us on our path, informed by the emotions of the heart, and the wisdom of conscious awareness. From this alignment, we speak to share truth, not to keep illusions intact. We create genuinely, and form healthy, loving, interdependent (not codependent) bonds with others.

Alignment of heart and wisdom is the profound truth that rises from the ashes of the destruction wrought by the chaos of misalignment. This coherence is not handed to us — it is something earned through earnest, endless self-inquiry, and courageous engagement with life. It is necessary to endure the fire of solitude until you feel safe and at peace in your own presence, and it is also necessary to allow the relentless mirror of life and relationships to refine you, and show you who you are.

The deepest gratitude of all, I think, must come with the true realization of oneness, when all obstacles to this absolute awareness have at last been removed. Along my spiral path home to this sacred essence, I am grateful for all beings I encounter (kind or unkind), and all experiences (easy or hard), because all of it is the lessons I need to help me find my way….and that, I believe, is the purpose of this life.

Sun & Moon song

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Growth may happen under pressure sometimes, but healing rarely can. Most of us are conditioned to put a timeline on everything, and to compare ourselves and our lives - including our healing and growth - to others. We may feel good about ourselves when we can progress through hard transitions quickly, and poorly about ourselves when our progress looks slow or inconsistent.

A counselor once introduced me to an idea of ‘the 3 cups.’ The one in the center is mine, representing my own intuition and self-guidance, and the cups to either side of mine represent other people’s thoughts and opinions of me or my choices. I am not grounded in my center if I ‘drink from other people’s cups,’ and then let their opinions of me sway how I feel about myself - feeling good about myself if they offer praise or approval, and badly about myself if they offer criticism or judgment. The solution is to drink only from my own cup. This doesn’t mean that I don’t listen to others, and consider what they have to say, it just means that I continue drinking only from my own cup: I know my worth, and what I need for safety and healing, by listening for my own deepest wisdom from within.

Self-reliance during transitions is really important, because these are times for paying especially close attention to our own unique needs. Even the most basic everyday transitions such as waking in the morning and going to sleep at night, deserve our internal mindfulness because how we navigate them can determine the quality of our day or our sleep - even our overall well-being. Nobody but you can feel what your body needs to feel calm, grounded, safe and well. It can be helpful to lean on others for support and possibly understanding, yet only you will truly know what is helping your whole self to navigate a transition with grace and presence. Lots of (often conflicting) advice from well-meaning other people can actually throw you off-course, undermine your self-confidence, and impede your progress.

Succumbing to confusion and overwhelm is a dangerous pitfall during big transition times. If you feel this happening, rest and take a break from any decision-making or meaning-making. Slow things down, and focus on basic self-care or mundane tasks (“Chop wood, carry water”). In fact, magnify your self-care! This fall, I have been navigating the transition of a cross-country move, as well as the ending of important relationships. All while tending to a hip that makes walking difficult and may need surgery. Now that the initial dust has begun to settle, what is helping most of all is the coziness I am creating in my home, just for me. It is heartening to sit by the fire in my woodstove, surrounded by the simple beauty I am creating in my home sanctuary. With the weather turning colder, and injury preventing my usual movement patterns, this home is my primary healing & transition space, and I want it to feel cozy and nurturing. This sends a clear message to myself that my comfort matters. I am protecting a space of heart-connection with myself.

Shifting gears just a bit - for readers who are in transition to a healthier lifestyle, and especially to a raw vegan dietary path, extra challenges come with the colder weather and the holiday times. If you are relatively new in a transition toward a raw vegan lifestyle, it will be helpful to start focusing now on preparing yourself for the upcoming challenges. I am ordering a big case of fresh dates ( https://datepeople.net/ ) which make yummy, easily-accessible wintertime treats and add some hearty un-chilled calories. They are also nice for holiday recipes such as in raw pie-crusts, or warmed blended drinks. I’ve also been stocking up on satiating sweet persimmons!

Beyond food preparations though, is tending to your emotional inner landscape. Almost everyone sometimes uses food to avoid emotions, and both cold dreary weather and increased family gatherings (or not having family gatherings), can really push our emotional buttons. We are navigating the seasonal weather transition, as well as what the winter holiday season may evoke in our hearts, minds, and bodies. While I am enjoying the coziness of snuggling up by the woodstove in the colder season, and probably journaling and reading more than I do in summertime, I know it is imperative in this transition to keep moving my body daily, however I am able to, and eating the healthiest diet. Maintaining the best self-care and self-connection is my shield against the emotional and physical hardships that can present in the winter and holiday seasons.

When I prioritize my mindful self-care even more during significant transition-times, I feel better and have more capacity to hold higher quality thoughts - thoughts of gratitude, acceptance, and trust in the bigger picture and the higher wisdom. If overwhelm and confusion threaten my peace, it’s time to rest and recalibrate, for as long as it takes to come back to my equilibrium. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, or how many ups and downs there are in your transition process, so much as it matters that you tend your soul by doing your best to stay connected to yourself, and your own inner wisdom that will guide you through everything life brings.

A couple of days ago, I slipped while rounding a corner in my home, wearing slippery socks on the polished wood floor, and carrying a jug of water. It happened in the blink of an eye, as these things do, and I fell hard onto the steel frame and corner of my firewood rack. OUCH! I got pretty banged up, most notably my ribcage. I crept to my bed and just lay there for a few quiet moments, looking out the window and thinking “what the heck?!!” After a couple of “why more, why now?!” whimpers, I knew I had to shift into acceptance. MORE REST is the prescription I gave to myself — to listen, calm, and heal all the parts of me that have been recently tried and traumatized.

The next day, I visited my precious new granddaughter on her 1-week birthday. My son and his wife are sleep-deprived, but beaming with pride and joy. Tiny Sameera is complete pure innocence. A breath of the freshest air, and an inspiration to devote myself to the healing and wholeness I want to meet her with.

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I am a very happy, proud and grateful Nana! My daughter Hannah is expecting her second baby to join our growing Michigan clan in February. It is a season of baby abundance!

And, It’s PERSIMMON time, too! Here is a re-post of my persimmon article, with information to help you enjoy this wonderful wintertime treasure in the north.

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If you’re not sure how to access this quietly powerful frequency, it shows up through curiosity and wonder, or simple presence. The easiest way for me to feel it is through paying attention to a direct physical experience, such as paying attention to actually feeling my bare feet on the ground, or the breeze, rain, or sunshine on my bare skin, or a single very conscious breath, or even the sensation of a tear on my cheek. Another way I access miracle energy is to focus my attention on something in my bigger environment, like the sunlight or moonlight playing on the walls in my house, the movements of my own hands, a person walking by, the leaves dancing in a puff of breeze, a bird or a bug doing its thing.

If I am willing to be curious for even just a few seconds, I shift into awe of the miracle I am witnessing. In this brief state of presence, the frequency of miracle energy is all that I feel or am aware of. Even if I can only hold this presence for a few seconds or minutes at a time, it changes me. It provides potent contrast to the chaotic or dissonant, confusing energy of mental or emotional obsessions or stresses, and it pierces my psyche like a laser-beam of fresh perspective that cuts right through all the jangled shards of ‘noise and commotion.’

Everything is a miracle, really. This world is a miracle, I am a miracle, my hands are miracles, my thoughts and feelings are miracles, my breath is a miracle, my tears are a miracle, my food is a miracle, every blade of grass, every leaf, every rock and every bug are miracles, the sky is a miracle. Really feel this! My suffering completely disappears when I shift into the naturally intoxicating frequency of miracle energy.

Suffering returns, but it has been changed by the realization, however fleeting it may have been, of miracle energy. A beautiful part of healing is that the more we experience the feeling in our body of this higher natural frequency, the more we gravitate toward it again, and again, and again.

This happened in a simple, measurable way on my raw vegan dietary path — the more fresh ripe fruit I included in my diet every day, the more attractive the high-quality, juicy ripe fruit became to all of my senses, and all of my cells. I began to perceive any other food as having a lower, less vibrant and less desirable frequency. My capacity for comfortably holding the new vibration given by the higher frequency foods gradually increased.

Miracle energy is what we are made of. Accessing it is like coming home. It is presence, and it is the calm beneath or beyond the chaos of what we have come to think of as our life. Miracle energy is the closest thing to REAL that we can experience, in our human form. We don’t need to make meaning of it - it is ENOUGH just to experience it. Imagine what could shift if you gave yourself at least three doses of miracle energy every day….or why not more?

There IS one significant common side effect — disorientation that comes from glimpsing reality differently, or vibrating at a different frequency than other humans around you. If you can keep things in perspective, this is actually a positive side effect, it just requires a bit of adjustment.

Some of my readers may think I am being too simplistic. All I really know is that every moment that I spend inhabiting miracle energy has a profoundly positive effect on my own ability to recover, rewrite, and rebound from even the most challenging life events. I still explore my thoughts and feelings in a journal every day, and speak to a counselor or mentor when I want to. I prioritize physical movement, natural diet, rest, and all the other basics of premium self-care. But nothing has as immediate and transformative of a positive impact as the embodied experience of miracle energy.

Next time you notice yourself caught in a negative thought-loop, or lost in overwhelming emotion, remember the idea of miracle energy, and will yourself to focus on something tangible outside of the confines of your habitual mind. Let yourself feel a sense of wonder and curiosity. Let yourself notice the miraculous: it is literally EVERYWHERE ALL THE TIME, when you choose to remember to notice, and feel the awe.

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FRUIT FESTIVALS IN 2026:

April 30-May 3: (I will be there!)
https://texasfruitfestival.com/

**June 14-18: (I will be there!)
https://www.veganwellnessretreats.com/
**Use discount code: ELLEN$100 at checkout to save $100 off your ticket

August 9-16:
https://thewoodstockfruitfestival.com/

The first 2 decades of my adult life were anchored by a steady partnership, and the early years of raising a family. The next 2 decades, precipitated by divorce, were anchored only by my own steady commitment to personal growth. I explored a variety of unknown avenues for deepening and sharing my greatest discoveries on my personal healing path, such as a raw vegan diet, yoga, unschooling, spirituality, community-building, and growing self-awareness. It was a very challenging, creative and exciting time of self-discovery and new, expanded self-expression. I was rapidly breaking out of worn-out old molds, and finding my authentic voice. The liberation was exhilarating, and my enthusiasm often led to big and somewhat impulsive decisions at times, and always an overly full plate.

It’s said that hindsight is 20/20….and looking back over the past 20+ years since my divorce, with such varied and adventurous life-experiences under my belt, I now have quite a lot of material evidence revealing the threads of familiar patterns that played and re-played in each of the many different situations I attracted throughout that time period. The nature of a recent and surprising relationship-ending has been the catalyst for new clarity, because this one pushed me abruptly up against a stark truth: I downplay early ‘red flags’ when new opportunities present themselves, in favor of giving my heart the free rein that it desires. I admire my courage to try new things, and to step into discomfort when I see an invitation to potential greatness — yet I often realize in hindsight the consequences of an imbalance in leadership between heart and wisdom.

My courage to follow my heart’s deeper longings and fervent whispers definitely opened up for me an exciting, off-the-beaten-path journey. In my self-made lifestyle I have been unapologetically unconventional with money, career, childrearing, diet and healthcare, and even housing. I have explored partnerships with men who seemed open to showing me their heart and growing together, and who embrace unconventionality like I do. And I have devoted myself to serving others in ways truly aligned with my heart and soul.

I don’t regret any of these choices, for each and every one has added to my treasure-chest of freely-chosen life experiences that show me who I have been, who I am, what I need, and who I am becoming. With healthy respect toward calmer, steadier lives (I have often envied you people!), I can see how rapidly my self-learning-curve has risen, for having thrown myself wholeheartedly into so many different experiences in a short time, and especially for having endured so many hard losses amidst all the creative fun and excitement. I am choosing to trust that all of this is what I needed for my evolution — because it is what I got, and I do believe in a friendly and compassionate universe. I am amused by a quote I found the other day:

In the way that flexibility of our bodies must be balanced with muscular strength if we want to create a resilient body, heart-led living must be balanced with true wisdom if we want a resilient life.
This is the truth that really crystalized for me recently. I always believed I was listening to wisdom in my former choices. However, with that powerful thing called 20/20 hindsight, I can see that I very often gave my heart’s throbbing desires too much power, and semi-consciously kept wisdom at arm’s length so it could not ruin my fun. With the enthusiasm of a child discovering things for the first time, I often rushed in with both feet rather impulsively and without needed boundaries - because my heart wanted to experience this latest new adventure, now! I think I was afraid to let wisdom have too much influence, for fear it might talk me out of the adventures I wanted to have. I moved quickly into commitments, before wisdom could convince me to slow down and listen more deeply (and possibly adjust my course).

On balance, many of those commitments have remained steady and aligned over 2+ decades, such as my raw vegan diet and some other unconventional lifestyle preferences. My mostly unschooled children are all thriving, and my distrust of most societal institutions has served me well. My less conventional ways with money have provided me some profitable investments. The reality is, there are some opportunities in life that require quick decision-making and early commitment. My courage to leap at these times brought me some truly incredible opportunities, for which I am forever grateful.

I have also paid a real price for my heart-led living. I have often made decisions faster, and moved myself into them quicker, than my whole self could fully register and keep pace with. I often left parts of myself behind, in other words. I learned early that if you don’t experience some feelings of fear and discomfort, you are probably not doing much that is of true significance. When I know what I really want, I am willing to trade some comforts for it. But it’s important to know which comforts can be safely traded without compromising the Self.

The realization that has come more slowly to me, is that it is critical to learn to sense when deeper inner listening is required, and this cannot be rushed. It often requires a slowing down, a period of stillness, and honest detachment from temporary desires, opportunities, timelines and outcomes.

One thing I know is that opportunities never stop presenting themselves. When one door closes, many more stay open…as long as I remain open. A personal commitment is growing in me. It is a commitment to be willing to wait for the kind of clarity which honors all of me. Being an enthusiastically heart-led visionary and idealist comes quite naturally to me, and my open heart and actively creative mind find exciting new adventures easily. The adventurous spirit in me often wants to jump right in and play! So, I see that what I am embarking on now, in this personal season of ‘real, raw, reckoning,’ is a kind of next-level re-parenting of myself. It is time to fully harvest and honor the depths of wisdom I have been accessing all these years, and to trust this inner voice to bring a healthy balance to my heart-led impulses.

Wisdom, to my understanding, is more akin to intuition than to mental processing. It is tapping into the guidance available from a higher state of consciousness. That’s why accessing true wisdom often requires periods of stillness, and an uncommon depth of listening. It’s hard to hear wisdom when my heart is fluttering with its latest desires. It’s hard to hear and honor wisdom when I have attachments to a certain outcome, or timeline. It’s hard to hear wisdom when I’m moving through life quickly, focused on what is temporary instead of what endures.

I still believe in heart-led living, and I will always place a top value on honoring the childlike innocence of my enthusiastic, naturally open-hearted ways of embracing life. A new caveat, for me, is that real wisdom must be given equal honor. What this looks like is that I am providing a retreat-like pace of life for myself, with a spaciousness that invites deeper awareness, observation, and self-reflection. Steadier self-care is a real priority.

I feel myself resting on one of the plateaus of life, provided for me by myself, for the honest work of a new level of self-integration. I am preparing myself for life’s next outer invitation, while remaining present for this critical inward time of self-recalibration. I have been made ready to trade the excitement of leaping at outer invitations, for the quiet inspiration of the inner invitation that is calling me into a quieter healing space, for a time.

DURING THIS SLOWER TIME I HAVE JUST TWO NEW SLOTS OPEN FOR PRIVATE COACHING, BY DONATION. SEND ME AN EMAIL IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO EXPLORE THIS OPPORTUNITY FOR DEEP, COMPASSIONATE
1:1 SUPPORT FOR YOURSELF THIS WINTER.

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I flew there from Michigan, with my first “raw buddy,” Leslie. We brought a large ripe cantaloupe melon to share on the airplane ride. We had to ask a vendor in the airport to cut it for us in the back of their shop, with their knife that was chained to the wall for security. We scooped out the seeds with our plastic airport spoons, and each carried our half onto the plane in our hands as we boarded. We got a lot of looks and whispers! And the airline stewardess told us that we made her day, when we each easily devoured an entire half of the large melon (at home each of us might have easily eaten the whole thing!). She was happy that she had a notable story to tell when she got home.

At RawStock I got to meet and thank in person the man who had been one of my first mentor/coaches, on the phone: Timothy Trader. I met several other prominent raw vegan educators and influencers I had been following online, and through their books. It was an amazing and deeply inspiring experience to witness these mentors in real life, embodying the raw vegan lifestyle for real and sharing their joy and success.

Next, raw buddy Leslie and I traveled to London, Ontario (Canada), 2 or 3 years in a row, for a more intimate raw vegan gathering at a couples’ lovely farmstead. I was so impressed by the greenhouse attached to and accessible through their kitchen, filled to the brim with healthy glowing salad greens and various fruits, and the arbor we sat under which was so abundantly draped with bunches of ripe grapes. Here I met other dedicated leaders, and more beautiful souls on a sincere healing path. I remember deep group sharings, seated in a circle on the ground, and just Leslie and I hanging out with with infamous Doug Graham at the fire-pit one night, helping to burn cardboard fruit boxes while we three chatted candidly about the important things in life.

Soon after, The Woodstock Fruit Festival was born in 2011, and this time I was invited to be a speaker! I felt so honored, and humbled, and I gave it my all. I returned to this popular festival as a primary speaker and teacher for 10 years, as it grew and grew. This festival gave my voice a microphone, a gracious audience, and the encouragement and confidence to embody and expand my own unique message in the raw vegan community. I created lifelong friendships with many of the “Pioneers,” as the early group of presenters was called.

These pics are some oldies, from the early days of the Woodstock Fruit Fest.

More recently, as The Woodstock Fruit Festival lost its longstanding venue in upstate New York, changed administration, and faltered for a couple of years before regaining new footing, The Vegan Wellness Retreat, and The Texas Fruit Festival were birthed and have both gained solid traction. I will be returning this summer for my third appearance at The Vegan Wellness Retreat, which now calls Michigan home, and I will make my first appearance this spring at The Texas Fruit Festival.

From eager student to devoted teacher and presenter, these festivals have had a huge positive impact on my life. One thing I am proud of championing at all the festivals where I present, is daily Support Groups. Early on at The Woodstock Fruit Festival, I observed the need, as I saw attendees struggling on the sidelines with the contents of the ‘Pandora’s Box’ of emotional baggage that spills open in an environment where everything is being questioned, awakening is an active process, and all of life’s plans and values are being renegotiated toward a higher path.

It’s not always easy to make the commitment to join one of these raw vegan fruit festival gatherings for the first time. Friends and family may raise an eyebrow, and question your motivations. You may even question yourself! Taking the road less traveled is not the easiest way through life. I truly love connecting with all who get themselves to these festivals, because these are open and receptive, courageous souls ready to break out of worn-out old patterns of conformity, and take a chance on something new, something healthier, something real. It’s not just the food that is real at these events, it’s the warmth, encouragement, truth-speak, and genuine connections.

If you are aiming higher with your health and wellness, if you need encouragement and support, if you would love to meet like-minded, present, and forward-minded community and create lasting friendships, if you want to immerse your children in a healthy environment, if you want to LEARN and study and be massively inspired….I invite you to make attending one or more of these festivals a real priority in 2026! I will be at the Texas and Michigan events, ready with a warm welcome for all newcomers and returnees. This is where we come to reignite our fruit-loving, nature-trusting community from around the world - every year. We return for the hugs, the reunion, the understanding companionship, the spirited drug-free PLAY, the learning and personal growth, and the shared recognition of nature’s true prescription for health, happiness and vitality.

These three festivals are unique in the vegan community. They focus on FRUIT as our true superfood and dietary staple. Greens are abundantly available too, and some gourmet raw vegan culinary creations - for fun, variety, and transitional support.

If you have not yet lived with fruit as your staple food, come and see what the hype is all about! Be ready to feel a new level of beautiful ENERGY rising in you! And if you have already found your way to this magical path, come and reconnect with your tribe.

To see more photos of all the fun, food, and community, and get all the information you need to get your tickets, click on the links below:

April 30-May 3: https://texasfruitfestival.com/

*June 14-18: https://www.veganwellnessretreats.com/
*Use discount code: ELLEN$100 at checkout to save $100 off your ticket

August 9-16: https://thewoodstockfruitfestival.com/

SEE YOU THERE!!

My mother gave me two comfy chairs, with a side table that is perfect for my mug of herbal tea and my reading and journaling supplies. It’s a narrow porch, and I often put my bare feet up on the wooden railing. I need to re-paint that railing before the cold settles in, as it is very old and has lots of chipping paint and bare wood showing. The wobbly, splintery old wooden floor-boards desperately need replacement. When I first moved into this house a few months ago, I had a grand idea to replace the whole porch and make it more spacious….but now that I have been inhabiting it I love it just the size that it is, and I only plan to make a few necessary repairs to make it last.

I live in a small rural village, surrounded by quiet and friendly neighbors. Last weekend, I was invited by my nearest three neighbors to join them on a kayaking adventure. We packed up four kayaks, in three vehicles, and met at a chain of lakes 15 minutes away. It was a glorious day, and we paddled about four miles through four different lakes, all connected by winding canals and tiny bridges. It was such a sweet way to connect with my neighbors, and I feel such gratitude for how they have welcomed me so warmly. I have received various invites from several neighbors at the other end of my short street, as well. Small-town life is just the right kind of friendly, for me.

My house is only three houses in from the busy main thoroughfare, and even though this is a very quiet, very small town, that road is a truck-route for semi’s hauling supplies across the state. Fortunately, the speed limit on this stretch of the route is 30 mph, and there are no stoplights or stop signs near where they are passing my street. So the big trucks just slowly rumble on by, but it was still shocking to my sensitive nervous system for the first few weeks or so. Big groups of motorcycles cruise by on weekends, exploring our beautiful countryside full of rolling hills, quaint small towns, and numerous lakes and beaches. Somehow I have mostly adjusted to the road noise, which thankfully nearly ceases in the nighttime. When an 18-wheeler does roll by in the dark of night, it looks pretty cool with its running lights outlining the whole shape of the truck.

I have trained my ears to focus more on the birdsong, when I am sitting on my porch. I intend to put plantings in my yard that will attract more birds, and butterflies, and also visually screen me from that busy road that is just three houses away to the south. Even though my yard is quite tiny, I am grateful for the sunny open grassy space, which is an invitation for me to choose what plants I’d like to surround myself with. My goal is to someday have even less grass to mow. Since this town is so rural, deer walk straight through our yards, so I have to keep that in mind when I choose plants!

My morning porch-time is a time of self-inquiry, and usually includes some meditation, some inspired reading, and some personal writing in my journal. Sometimes a neighbor wanders over for a brief hello and check-in, or a neighbor from up the street gives a friendly little honk as they drive by on their way somewhere. I have become a familiar morning sight in the neighborhood, apparently. (I do have a secluded backyard patio, to the west, when I want total privacy.) I love my morning ritual, which embodies and instructs the slower pace of life that I have come to cherish these days, and helps me to align myself well for the new day. Later in the afternoons, I often walk or ride my bike to one of my favorite neighborhood nature-spots, for some quiet contemplation time in the surround of bigger nature.

As the weather is beginning to turn cooler, I know that the time is fast approaching when it will become uncomfortable to sit still on my porch for long. My hands will be too cold to write. Candles on my dining room table, or a fire in my living room wood stove, will soon become the “sunshine” for an indoor morning ritual. I have been busy stacking firewood in my garage, in preparation. I am also installing an outdoor sauna on my back patio. I know how much I need warm radiant heat during the long cold Michigan winters! This will be my first one again, after five years living in Florida full-time. I do plan to continue spending time in warm southerly places for chunks of the winters, but this winter I am on-call here in Michigan, awaiting the births of two grand-babies!

I plan to order a big case of fresh dates from my friends at datepeople.net, which will make satisfying winter snacks. I will probably haul out my excalibur dehydrator, too, and make some raw pancakes, cookies, and warm dried fruits. Winter will be a good time to finish unpacking in my new home, and organizing my indoor writing and exercising spaces. It will be nice to be easily with family at holiday times, after spending several of them on my own in Florida the past few years.

My daughter-in-law, Aja, came over this week, and we chatted about her plans for a home-birth, and her thoughts about parenting. We sat at the dining room table, and while we talked we made little paintings with inspirational quotes, like the one pictured below (from “The Four Agreements,” by Don Miguel Ruiz). Aja is deep into her nesting-mode, with the baby due within the next few weeks. Their old farmhouse 9 miles down the road from me is still in the messy midst of major renovations, and I am helping her paint the kitchen in the hopes that it’s ready to use before the baby comes. They have been making all of their meals in a makeshift outdoor kitchen for months.

It’s 7pm on Saturday night, and thunder is rumbling through. I tried to get my lawn mowed and the rest of my firewood stacked under shelter before the rain comes, but my hip gave out today and those chores had to be left undone, for now. I am working diligently with a personal trainer, strengthening my challenged left hip and knee, in the hopes that I might regain more function and delay or avoid the hip replacement that’s been recommended. Today felt discouraging in that sense, but I’m getting pretty good at keeping it all in perspective, and I am enjoying some more restful time. I will likely be back at the gym on Monday. Doing my best, whether I’m responding to the need to rest, or showing up for a hearty workout at the gym when I’m able. Each day I’m different, and each day my morning porch time helps me meet myself right where I am.

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When a significant dream, vision, creative project, business collaboration, job, home, relationship, or plan we have deeply invested in, dissolves before fruition or completion, it can feel disorienting and even traumatic to the psyche, and deeply bruising to the heart. All the more so if this dissolution impacts or cracks the foundations of what a self-image or an identity may have been partially constructed upon, perhaps unconsciously; if we have been mistreated, or if buried pain from a core childhood wound was triggered in some way.

When closely-held dreams dissolve - and all that’s left is space where the dream once existed - a great deal of wisdom becomes available to us, if we can remain open and not close down in disappointment, frustration or grief. We are so conditioned to fill our lives, our mind and our time, with attachments to external things, relationships, activities and distractions, that there is a real temptation to fill the new space quickly - somehow - before we have to fully feel the pain of what there is to feel. Nature abhors a vacuum! Intense disappointment, grief, sadness, self-judgment, shame, frustration, or anger - these are hard emotions to sit with.

And when we do try to sit with them, our mental chatter can cause us to feel like we are sinking in emotional quicksand, if we credit our looping, judgmental negative thoughts with evidence of reality. If you can begin to simply meet the open space freed up by the disappearance of a dream, with no agenda to fill or change that space yet, you can step back and start to observe your mental chatter — just noticing it as it arises — and you can begin to see this thought-stream for what it truly is: a construction of your mind, not an unchangeable reality. This awareness is the first step toward pulling yourself out of the emotional quicksand. If you were truly sinking in real quicksand, trying frantically to claw your way out would only cause you to sink further. More calmly observing your situation is likely the only chance you’d have to access a practical strategic plan to free yourself.

Emotions may have to move through you first, but when you are able to become more attuned to the patterns of your thoughts, you gradually gain the power to change them, to reshape your mental models into ones that support your healing and growth. When you observe with awareness, you start to see thought-forms, not facts — fleeting, often irrational, and not necessarily reflective of reality. This is the power of awareness — it doesn’t eliminate the mental chatter, but it changes your relationship with the thoughts, and it becomes possible to navigate through them without getting completely entangled and stuck in their fabrication of reality.

One place where I still find myself getting hooked, is in attempting to influence or control what is beyond my control. I tend to work hard to try and salvage something from the wreckage of a dream that fell apart. I do think it is worth asking: “IS there something worthy of salvage here, and can that actually BE salvaged?” But if the clear answer to either part of this questions is “No,” then it’s time to surrender it all. I have expended too much of my life-energy efforting to salvage the unsalvageable, more times than I care to confess. I am a slow learner in this department. I do not give up or let go of a cherished dream easily!

An important lesson for me has been to allow the emotions that arise to flow through me, without minimizing or maximizing them, and to simultaneously do my best to dwell in the reality of NOW, rather than in the non-reality of my mental chatter and old story-loops that exacerbate emotions, or in the futility of grasping or trying to fix what wants to dissolve in order for a better alignment to come into focus.

Once the primary emotions have been felt sufficiently (and there is no right or wrong timeline for that), and I have taken note of my typical mental chatter, I find that I can begin to pivot by accessing some high-quality questions, such as:

• What did this dream really mean to me?

• Did it truly feel the way I imagined it would?

• What is the hardest part about losing it now?

• What is available to me in this new space that has been freed up?

• What new wisdom and messages are trying to break through for my highest good?

• What is needed for a better alignment?

• What can I see differently now, about what I truly desire in my life?

• How can I meet this new spaciousness with trust and openness?

• What kind of nurturing and support can I access for myself right now?
  

You can see how I can keep myself moving to higher ground through my journaling process!

Sometimes our most cherished dreams don’t make it to the finish-line, because all of the necessary elements for them to flourish simply weren’t there. These unrealized dreams can be seen as dress-rehearsals for the ones that WILL come to fruition. As long as we don’t shut down, or close ourselves off from the next adventure, new doors will open — and if we have treated ourself and our unrealized dream with love and respect, and learned all we can from its dissolution, we will be well-poised to engage with a new dream productively. We can choose to experience our life as an evolution in consciousness, each dream-exploration building mindfully upon the last as we cooperate wisely to evolve into greater and greater understanding and Self-realization. What more can we ask of this life?

The past week and a half has been messy and painful for me, and I am only just beginning to find the inner resources to re-ground myself. This is not my first rodeo with an unrealized dream, so I have already developed some real inner muscles I can call to action. As the children’s book says, “We can’t go under it, we can’t go over it, we can’t go around it….SIGH….we have to go THROUGH it.”

Deep inner listening, stillness, journaling, walking and sitting in nature, warm baths, extra gentle self-care and self-compassion, and leaning on trusted friends and family who will always have my back…this is what helps me through - every time. When we dare to dream, and when we dare to give our dream a try, we live a life rich with adventure and learning. The only true failure is if we stop believing in our dreams, and stop taking the necessary risks.

The hardest part for me has been when I just KNOW something to be true, and people very close to me can’t or won’t see it. This has often caused me to get caught up in a thought-loop such as, “They don’t respect my wisdom, and therefore they don’t respect ME!” Or, “They are going to hurt themselves if they don’t understand the importance of this, and I am going to feel responsible somehow, for not doing a good enough job of convincing them!”

In the early years of all my healing discoveries and remarkable personal benefits adhering to a raw vegan diet, I wanted other people to have my experience! I wanted to help reduce what I saw as their unnecessary suffering, and I was sure I had answers for them. I must have sounded a bit evangelical, and that’s how I felt! I was so sure I had found the way and the truth and the light…and if they would only LISTEN! Not surprisingly, I scared some people away with my enthusiasm about my new discoveries. I wasn’t grounded in the wholeness of the space that contains it ALL. I was attached to my new positions, and I wanted other people to see what I saw.

People’s frequent resistance to my positions, their confrontations with me, and their lack of interest or self-discipline in following the transformational steps I laid out for them — this is what ultimately caused me to see the futility in my own attachments, not only to my positions but also to my seeking to convince or transform others. It was causing distortions in me, and in my relationships.

It was an intensive inner process to relax and release my perceived need to convince others of the answers I had found. I eventually made a conscious decision to be like Peace Pilgrim, who simply offered herself as an example of inner peace and simple living, and rather than pushing a message she waited for those who would be naturally magnetized to her vibration and ask for her guidance. It was her way of choosing flow over force, and it worked! Perhaps not as many people were exposed to her beautiful message, but those who were, were the ones it was meant for, in the right natural timing.

On a month-long water fast in my sixth year on a raw diet, I had a powerful direct experience of the invisible, spacious, wise and loving Presence that is always whole and available beyond all of our positioning, and losing sight of our true selves by attaching to identity and form. After a couple of weeks of complete rest and no food to digest, I began to feel a safe yet powerful “golden light of Presence” expanding and emanating from deep within my heart. It was so expansive, and so beautiful to behold and to feel a part of! With tears of joy and recognition streaming down my face, I felt this golden light palpating in everyone and everything around me. This went on for the duration of the fast, and the experience has stayed with me permanently.

Going into the fast, my one fear was that my old mental demons from the depression I had suffered in my past, would rise to the surface to torment me again. Imagine my surprise and joy when instead what arose was the pure golden light I am truly made of! This direct experience was a turning point on my spiritual journey, because this proved to me what is real about who I am, and who we all are. Stripped of my usual life’s focus on doings and thinkings and identities and outer responsibilities, and deeply at rest in the spacious emptying of a total fast, I readily accessed what resides permanently beyond all of life’s seekings and attachments. Here in this restful empty spaciousness there was no resistance, no reaction, no position, no seeking or needing - only Truth. And what a beautiful, liberating truth! There is a field of energy that I am made of that is invisible to the eye, yet always and forever invincibly whole. We just forget about it when we are so distracted in life.

I give a talk at raw vegan festivals in which I offer a simple exercise to provide a glimpse of this Presence behind the scenes. Participants choose a partner and sit directly facing each other, close enough that knees nearly touch. They close their eyes, and I guide them through a quick process of imagining layers, and yet more layers, of identities and attachments falling away. I ask them to imagine what is left when all of that is let go. Then, eyes opened, they gaze steadily and silently into their partner’s eyes for an uninterrupted 120 seconds. There are a few giggles, and some tears. It feels long! In the sharing afterwards, there are attempts to describe the indescribable - awe, soul-connection, God, Light, life-force, humility, Love, remembrance, reunion. Some participants feel self-conscious, as if they are intruding or being intruded upon. Others simply feel surprised and awed by the power of what they just experienced. Some want more…they long to go deeper.

“The moment doesn’t need your commentary to be whole.” - Vireya

We may believe that choosing a position connects us with others (who choose the same position), but it disconnects us from our wholeness, and of course it may appear to disconnect us from all those who choose a different position. Our attachment to a position not only disconnects us, it binds us and keeps us caught in a narrow focus, unable to feel what is truly REAL beyond all our human strivings. We are unwittingly stuck in temporary, unreal identity and form.

Choosing to root in Presence instead of positions is not detachment, it is returning to what is real, and more deeply connecting there. Positions and identities shift and fall apart over our lifetime. Presence remains whole, and peaceful. It is the light that we ARE, beyond all of the thoughts and things we experiment with in our human lifetime. When we remember this, and make it our sacred daily practice to consciously return to Presence by sitting in stillness and feeling the spaciousness, we can begin to hold our thoughts lightly, to hold our positions lightly, and to let emotions flow through us unobstructed by thought-stories we invent. We can discern with clarity what feels right for our own life choices, without feeling a need to defend, attack, contract, or seek agreement or approval. We can simply make our own life a living example of what matters most to us.

I watch without becoming.

I release what binds me.

I choose flow over force.

REMINDER FOR MICHIGAN READERS:

CD Release Celebration with the music of Leo K. Johnson

An evening of original music, contemplative presence & community connection.

Featuring an opening set by local duo Miko Fossum-Rowan & Jim Rowan

📅 Saturday, October 4th | 5pm – 8pm

📍 6363 Waters Road, Ann Arbor

✨ Free admission — or $10 donation includes a CD

Schedule:
Doors open 5:00 pm
Vegetarian Potluck & Community Connection 5:30 pm
Concert begins 6:30 pm

Leo K. Johnson is the author of The Emptying Path and Non-Reactive Intelligence. His music and writings weave contemplative presence, original songwriting, and spiritual practice.

This release celebrates his new album: Where the Ache Becomes the Sky — songs attuned to 432 Hz, carrying themes of stillness, presence, and healing.

Hosted with love by Ellen Livingston & Miko Fossum-Rowan.

We manage to soon fill that tiny open vessel with our own tensions, value-judgments, and urgencies. And gradually the child’s atunement to its natural state weakens. In our adult society, we have come to accept reactivity, disconnection, control and manipulation, and to value outer-world accomplishments above all. We seek to impress ourselves and each other with how much we can get done in a week….or, with how much stress and hardship we can claim. We live in a state of chronic tension and striving, and we have quite literally forgotten what true Presence feels like, much less how to return there.

When I experienced a deep burn-out years ago, I was forced to release many structures in my life, to clear a space for my recovery. It was in this extended period of extra space that I slowly returned to the joy of Presence. We often speak of ‘being present,’ and that is indeed a wonderful gift we can give to ourselves and to each other….yet I wish to distinguish Presence in a larger context than simply attending quietly to the moment at hand (which is of course a great starting place!).

Presence is where we truly know our wholeness, and feel our connection to the Love-Source of all life, the Life-Force that we cannot become separate from (only distracted from). Returning to Presence is like merging with the space behind all the happenings in life, or being like the sky behind the clouds. It is feeling ourself dissolving into the spaciousness that contains it all — everything. In Presence there is no effort to be made, no tension, no urgency, no reactivity, and no need. There is nothing to grasp, nothing to defend, nothing to solve, plan or control. Like the baby, we are open, empty, available, observant, aware, and allowing of all of life.

I think we have all glimpsed this state many times, yet we don’t know how to maintain the embodiment. Life’s many pulls and imprints quickly hook us back into distraction, exhaustingly narrow focus, and inner tension.

Presence matters because it dissolves stress and tension, enables true connection to Self and others, and gives us access to wisdom. Knowledge may come from external sources, but wisdom is found within — when there is sufficient stillness and spaciousness. Just imagine for a moment, how different our world would feel if everyone in it remembered how to access Presence every day!

It’s not easy to find words to describe what I mean by embodying Presence. It’s an energetic frequency, a vibrational tone that is felt throughout the body. I feel it like a quiet euphoria, a pervasive subtle tingling, and an expansive heart — a calm, safe, vibrant aliveness. Like the ultimate feeling of connection, and rightness of being. I find it is much easier to return to this natural state when I am alone, and in nature — walking barefoot through a quiet forest, floating in the ocean, lying under a tree canopy or under the stars, standing in the rain, sitting in the sunshine….when I am alone, and especially in nature, I feel more free to tune into the natural vibrations all around me, and to feel the depth of our resonance.

I find that the more I protect this kind of time for myself, the more I am able to extend the duration of my felt connection to this state of Presence, even when I return to the land of other people and activities. As with most things, the more familiar it becomes, the easier it is to do it — or in this case, to BE it.

When I am with other people, or in a distracting, noisy, or extra stimulating environment, I find that I need to remind myself about Presence! I can easily be caught by the dazzle of the moment, which might cause me to talk excitedly or reactively, get hooked by stressful thoughts, or move and do at an uncomfortably fast pace. There is nothing wrong with enthusiastic talking or doing, except that it tends to veer me further away from the blissful connection I feel in the relaxed state of Presence.

Learning to bring Presence into relationship matters, because it is how we will cultivate healthy, real connection and communion with each other. In Presence we naturally listen, and offer unconditional Love and compassion. In Presence we already feel safe and connected, and so we release our attachments and agendas. We have no need to control the outer world, or other people. We are not trying to get anything. We already feel whole, and sovereign, and we simply feel a natural desire to connect with others for fun and communion. We are not seeking conflict, and we are not looking for problems. We are living in Love.

Bringing Presence into relationships begins with slowing down and pausing often, to consciously BREATHE and give ourselves a chance to remember what Presence feels like in our body. We need to pause and “scroll out” to encompass a wider lens, and begin dropping into it, like bringing ourselves behind the clouds into the expanse of sky, or under the waves to merge with the whole of the ocean.

A simple example is when I am lying in bed in the morning just after waking up, I might have a random stressful thought pop into my awareness, such as something that could go wrong or must get done that day. My initial reaction might be to feel suddenly stressed or anxious, and I will feel my nervous system ramping up into irritation. These body cues are often my first signal of disconnect, and my cue to remind myself about Presence.

One way I begin is to focus on feeling the comfort of the bed I am lying on, notice the beauty of the morning light playing on the walls, feel my feet touch each other happily, stretch my arms overhead (in other words, notice the simple beauty around me, and the good feeling of being in my body rather than the distractions of the mind). Now that I am more present in the reality of the moment, I will use my mind consciously to envision myself expanding out beyond or behind the temporary thoughts and reactions, and coming into the larger Presence that contains it all.

Instantly, I have now put the thought in its rightful place — a temporary visitor that I can choose how to greet (or ignore), and my nervous system feels relief, as I have now told it that it was just a false alarm. Presence is a space of safety, and it is a nurturing space because it is our connection to the Big Love that is always available for us if we will simply remember that it is who we are / what we are made of.

Just like any other skill, this requires some training. We have all been programmed to treat our thoughts like truth, when in fact the vast majority of them are nonsense and all of them are unreal. Presence is what is real, and this is perhaps the most important thing to remember in life.

If you want to greatly enhance your ability to touch Presence every day, and to begin to bring it to your relationships and activities, eat a diet of whole plant foods, mostly fruit, and spend a lot of quiet time in nature on a regular basis. This is a fast-track to unburdening the body and mind, and opening the beautiful, blissful heart-connection that makes life more joy-full.

NRI Presence Circle: Episode Five – Presence is the True Gift We Offer

If you’d like to explore this theme of Presence more deeply, Kevin and I recently recorded an NRI Presence Circle on the very same topic — Presence is the True Gift We Offer. In this session we share reflections, practices, and a simple way to begin working with the Mirror Questions. You can listen here:

CD Release Celebration with the music of Leo K. Johnson

A tranquil evening of original music, contemplative presence & shared connection

Featuring an opening set of original music by local duo Miko Fossum-Rowan & Jim Rowan

Saturday, October 4th, 5pm-8pm
6363 Waters Road, Ann Arbor
FREE admission
or $10 donation includes a CD

Doors 5pm.
Vegetarian Potluck & Community Connection 5:30pm
Concert begins at 6:30

Leo K Johnson is the author of The Emptying Path and Non-Reactive Intelligence. His music and writings weave together contemplative presence, original songwriting, and spiritual practice. Leo is releasing Where the Ache Becomes the Sky — songs attuned to 432 Hz, carrying themes of stillness, presence, and healing.

Hosted with love by Ellen Livingston & Miko Fossum-Rowan

I revisited this quote by Scott Fitzgerald:

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless yet be determined to make them otherwise.”

For me — forever interested in the pursuit of the next level of self-development and personal growth — this super-charged environment was a perfect theater to dramatize emotional reactivity, making it easier to really SEE how our triggers play out on the stage of daily life. I became more determined than ever to get a back-stage pass, to get access to the hidden causes behind our chronic human reactivity, and to finally find the key to healing my own.

When we react emotionally or impulsively, instead of responding in an empowered way, it’s a clear sign that we are triggered. When we blame, shame, attack, push our views, raise our voice or get defensive, we are triggered. When we sulk, withdraw, or run away, we are triggered. When we dwell in sadness or anger, we are triggered. Also, when we pressurize or frighten ourself, speak negatively about ourself or feel sorry for ourself, we are triggered. The first step in the trigger dance is to RECOGNIZE when we are triggered. Only then can we hope to choose a graceful next step.

One of my own most frequent internal triggers is pressurizing self-talk. I tell myself I need to please others, or frighten myself with stories of not having enough time or resources. I can trigger my nervous system into uncomfortable overdrive with imaginary claims of overwhelm, or conjure up a fear of falling behind into chaos, or imploding under unmanageable pressure. I learned long ago that I am an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) meaning that I am one of the 20-30% of humans naturally born with a highly sensitive nervous system — which then readily picked up imprints in my early childhood experiences — making me highly vigilant as well as easily overstimulated. This combination can lead easily to frequent experiences of emotional “flooding” and nervous system dis-regulation, if I am not aware of my needs and confidently able to set loving boundaries for myself.

Being an HSP may be what urged me to decide consciously to learn to understand and overcome the triggers causing my suffering. Yet all of us have a nervous system, and early imprints form neurological pathways that lead to our own personal patterns of reactivity. When we identify our unique imprints and subsequent reactivity tendencies, we can intervene and effectively rewire ourselves, and rewrite our script.

Perhaps you react when you feel unsafe, confused, caught off-guard, criticized, or blamed. Or maybe your core trigger arises when you feel ignored, dismissed, misunderstood, or abandoned. Maybe you just can’t stand it when someone speaks as though they have the upper hand, or assume moral authority over what is right, wrong, or true. All of these triggers stem from a core childhood imprint, now embedded deep within our psyche and nervous system.

Reactivity patterns stem from early childhood imprints, but they continue throughout our lives because of a lack of grounding, true self-awareness, supportive tools and community, and clarity of purpose (or internal compass setting). It’s easy to fall in step with the collective dance, which could be called the “He-Said/She-Said,” or the “I Should/You Should” dance.

When I decided that a raw vegan way of eating was the healthiest path for me, I had to commit consistently to a lot of internal and external re-wiring! I had to raise my ideas about self-responsibility, and self-respect, up a big notch. The same is true on a path of non-reactivity.

If you are weary of the endless suffering caused by reactivity patterns, a good first step is to bring more periods of quiet and stillness into your days. Just this shift will allow you to begin to see more clearly. Writing down what you observe about what tempts a reaction in you can be really helpful. Notice where and how you feel the reactivity in your body, and what tends to happen next. This kind of intentional self-observation will help you to see your most common patterns. We react to the words and behaviors of other people, to the conditions in our environment, and to the thoughts in our own mind.

Once you see clearly what is happening on exhausting repeat, you can decide what you would like to change in yourself. There are many intervention strategies, and most begin with pausing to collect yourself before you respond. Just today, I returned a friend’s call and he thanked me for my perfect timing, because answering my call saved him from impulsively reacting verbally to a neighbor’s upsetting behavior. It takes a lot of practice, but we can learn to do this for ourselves — to pause, slow down, widen our lens, feel our feet on the ground, take a conscious breath, let the initial rush subside, and choose a different response. We do not have to keep defaulting to the old imprints forever.

If this sounds like a bit of work, it is! But the alternative is to keep suffering with our destructive reactivity. My experience is that it becomes exciting and inspiring for people when they have an effective map and tools, and they begin to feel the benefits of a steadier nervous system and newly emerging self-mastery.

When I began my raw vegan journey, I learned that the two bodily processes that use up the majority of our available energy on a given day, are the conduction of digestion and emotions. Simplify what you eat, and learn to navigate your emotions with grace and poise, and you will be amazed at how much energy is recovered for all the other parts of life.

Coaching With Ellen

What I recognize in Kevin’s work is an exquisite articulation of my own life’s deepest questions, struggles, losses, and sincere seeking, as well as the deep relief of a seasoned seeker who has landed in the timeless truths that are now guiding a simpler, more peaceful and grounded way of joyful life, and loving service. Like mine, Kevin’s offerings have evolved organically through his own personal quest to understand himself, his relationships, his reactivity, and his highest form of relationship to life.

I think most of us can agree that the past 5 years have tested our ability to navigate our collective reactivity, and even sanity. Sadly, on the battlefield of accumulated arsenals of powerful propaganda and coercive programming, we have fallen into more and more divisiveness and even dangerous polarization. Kevin’s more recent books: The Emptying Path, and Non-Reactive Intelligence, emerged from his quest to settle and heal deep disturbances in his own personal experience. Through an unusual kind of wisely self-guided collaboration with an AI companion, what emerged is a powerful blueprint for releasing reactivity and restoring healthy, peaceful sovereignty through pure presence and observation.

Kevin shared this blueprint of 10 principles with me, and I joined him in intentionally practicing one each day. We began to share our insights and discoveries with each other from each practice, and immediately realized the shared joy of connecting with one another in this supportive way on our spiritual healing paths. Each principle comes with a teaching reflection, a morning centering practice, and a daily affirmation. These timeless truths are offered in the context of a light and accessible structure that anyone can follow.

Here is a sample, from Principle 6: Letting Go is Strength, Not Surrender

Teaching Reflection: Letting go is not weakness — it is spiritual courage. Holding on to being right, being validated, or being seen creates tension. Non-Reactive Intelligence sees this grasping and gently releases it. Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care. It means you care enough to not be imprisoned by needing control. You choose peace over proving.

Morning Centering Practice: Breathe deeply, and exhale as if releasing something heavy.

Daily Affirmation: “I release what binds me. I choose flow over force.”
Whenever you feel tightness today, pause and repeat the exhale. Let go again.

We believe this is what is missing in most people’s busy and distracted lives - a practical structure for restoring our natural state of peace and harmony, and just as importantly, a trusted space in which to share this quiet, intimate inner journey with others. Our idea is to simply share how we have been supporting each other, and to invite the expansion of this nurturing process in the form of small Presence Circles all over the world.

Mission Statement:

The NRI Presence Circle is a space for practicing the Ten Principles of Non-Reactive Intelligence. These principles are simple and embodied — no gurus, no theories, just presence. They restore our freedom to live with clarity, compassion, and strength. Each circle is an invitation to discover that presence itself is stronger than reaction.

Purpose of the Circle:
The NRI Presence Circle is not a study group or therapy session. It is a sacred space for practice — to embody the Ten Principles of Non-Reactive Intelligence in daily life. Circles provide a rhythm of stillness, reflection, and honest sharing that supports each participant in living from presence rather than reaction.

Kevin videotaped himself introducing the idea of the Presence Circles, and then we made a video of the two of us exploring the second principle (see links below). We will be creating and sharing a 30-minute video for each of the remaining principles, as guidance for you to create your own Presence Circles with trusted friends, online or ideally in person. We are learning as we go, and we invite you to join us in this unfolding process!

All the video guidance is provided for you at the links below, as well as a printable pdf document with the principles and practices to use in your circle. Non-Reactive Intelligence, the book, explores each of the principles in more depth.

We envision a worldwide shift in which Presence dissolves reactivity, and nourishes re-connection. A world where we all begin to remember that Love is our natural state, and that space, and stillness, help us to know what is real and sacred. It is easy to succumb to feelings of overwhelm and anxiety when we feel rushed, pressured, and disconnected, and this just perpetuates itself in an exhausting negative loop.

Real and meaningful intervention is needed, and the way this will happen is when individuals and small groups take the time out to return to these fundamental truths that will recalibrate our nervous systems, and empower us to live in peace with each other. As Peace Pilgrim would say, “Outer peace comes from inner peace.”

What Kevin offers through the principles of non-reactive intelligence is a simple framework for a contemplative inner practice which helps us build the skills we all need to live in the freedom we all desire. The freedom to engage with each other, and with all the complexities of our world, from a peaceful knowing of our grounded wholeness. The freedom to rest in our true selves, free from debilitating anxiety and destructive reactivity.

Together, we offer you a sample Presence Circle for each of the ten principles. In these short videos, you will get a glimpse of how a Presence Circle sharing might look. We invite you to imagine how this kind of quiet, supportive circle could help ground and enrich your own experience. Perhaps you would like to start your own circle, with one or more friends. We will provide you with the materials and support to help you get started (at low to no cost). You can begin today by watching the first two videos in our new Presence Circle playlist on youtube!

NRI Presence Circle playlist on YouTube:

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLBgjesT4xpXIXcpTW4qFomIZld_kI1QEe&feature=shared

🧘‍♂️ Based on lived practice, not theory — no therapy, no gurus, just presence.

Download the free Guide for NRI Presence Circles: https://drive.google.com/file/d/18CUI...

💫 Non-Reactive Intelligence: The Art of Invincible Presence delves even deeper into these transformative principles: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHWJG2N1

What is Non-Reactive Intelligence (NRI)?

Non-Reactive Intelligence is the art of meeting life without being ruled by reaction. It is a simple yet profound practice of presence — observing rather than collapsing into old imprints of fear, anger, or need. At its heart are ten guiding principles, each pointing to the same truth: that freedom is found in stillness, honesty, and compassionate boundaries.

NRI is not about suppressing feelings, but about creating space between what happens and how we respond. In that space, clarity appears. In that clarity, love becomes natural. NRI offers a way to live from invincible presence — steady, kind, and free.